Several years ago, I sat across from my attorney and went through the depressing, yet incredibly necessary task of creating my will. I was in my late 20’s and I thought I really had life all figured out. After answering all the standard questions, I told my attorney to add what I thought to be a brilliant clause; “In order for any of my children to collect their inheritance, they must have completed college”.
In my vast ignorance, I thought that would motivate my children to choose the path that I had chosen. I was proud of the letters after my name and I hoped that someday my children would have even more letters after their names! Thank goodness I came to my senses! There are many reasons why titles shouldn’t matter. Titles may be PhD, MBA, CPA, Director, President, CEO, Mom, Stay at Home Mom (or Dad), Introvert, Extrovert, etc. I believe a title is anything that attempts to classify you.
- Your title doesn’t define your health. You can go to college for fifteen years, get every degree available, make more money than you ever imagined, and if you don’t have your health, you have nothing. I have met so many people in high-powered positions with impressive jobs, yet they are holding on by a string. High paying jobs usually come with high stress levels. Stress is a killer.
- Your title won’t keep you from being lonely. If you are working sixteen-hour days to maintain your title, but you don’t get to tuck your children in bed, you may regret that some day. If your wife eats dinner alone because you are always out of town, your marriage may suffer. How valuable is your time and who owns it? If your title is your job, then yes, it’s important to make enough money to provide for your family. But how much is enough? Is it ever enough? Our Pastor at church always says that out of all the dying people he has spoken with, none ever say they wish they had spent more time at work.
- Your title will never make you happy. I have met so many people who were on a mission to chase a title. If I can just be a manager, if I can just be a Director, if I can just be a VP; we are never happy where we are. I went through a brief period where I was jealous of stay at home moms. After a few days with my kids I couldn’t wait to get back to work! My daughter almost went to college for something that I wanted her to do. Everyone had her convinced that she would never make enough money doing what she loves. I say phooey. If you love it enough and if it is your passion, you will make it work. She is now starting school in July to be a makeup artist and I hope she rocks it because she’s so talented and that is what makes her happy! If you have to spend the majority of your life doing something, shouldn’t it be something that makes you smile?
- Your title is not an automatic entitlement for respect. I believe in treating everyone with respect. I don’t care if you are the janitor or the President of the company. Someone once said to me, “Don’t you know who so-and-so is? He is the blah blah blah of *insert impressive company here”. I honestly couldn’t have cared less. In God’s eyes, we are all the same. Anyways, the bible clearly tells us that some day, the first will be last and the last will be first. You can interpret that however you would like, but my take on it is that Mr. Super Important Job Title will be serving coffee to my friend the janitor!
- Your title doesn’t define your worth. I have sat in classes where I have been told my personality type, my personality color, and my personality shape. Please stop defining me! I don’t need a special group because I’m a “working mother” or an “MBA”. I don’t need called out because a test I took defined me as an Introvert. My worth is determined by one thing and one thing only, and that is by my Maker. Every single one of us is “wonderfully and fearfully made”. Let that sink in for a minute. You don’t have to spend a bazillion years in college to be important. You don’t have to be an Extrovert, or a stay at home dad. Every single one of us is equally important. You just need to find the path that God has chosen for your life, and hopefully, that will be the one that makes you THRIVE! And when you walk that perfect path, no matter what the title, you will be healthy, happy, worthy of respect and you will know that you are worth EVERYTHING to the only one who matters!
My hope for all of our children is that they find and follow their calling, the thing that makes them jump out of bed in the morning. I pray that they are healthy and happy, no matter what title follows them into adulthood. And although that title is not important, hard work is! What you get out of life will always be proportionate with what you put in, and any difference is due to God’s grace!